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Forgiveness in ChristI screamed at her with an anger that was stronger than any I had experienced before, saying, “I could never forgive you! I cannot believe you did this to me!” That was the only thing I could remember when that incident happened a year ago. I was upset, disturbed, and angry. “I would never forgive her,” I told her, the Lord, and myself. It was the most horrible experience I ever had. To be able to forgive someone who betrayed me purposely and whom I trusted previously was the hardest thing for me. I remembered this particular experience very well. I tried so many times in myself to forgive her. However, every time I saw her my anger was re-kindled. So I asked myself, “Will I ever forgive her?” The answer always would be NO. This experience happened before I knew that the divine life in me could heal any bitterness in my heart, supply my soul, and enliven my spirit. After being many years in Christianity, I never knew that Christ is living IN me (Colossians 3:4). This Christ is so personal, rich and sweet. Moreover, I could actually experience this rich Christ. Every day He dispenses His divine life into me faithfully. I received this teaching by reading Witness Lee's ministry. As soon as I knew this glorious fact, I just learned to enjoy this life by loving Him (Mark 12:30), calling on His name (Romans 10:12-13), living for Him, and expressing Him every day. As I enjoy this divine life, this life within me is flowing day by day in my being (John 7:38). Then one day, this divine life eventually reached into my emotion. The Lord reminded me of this particular incident. I remembered clearly when He asked, “Are you going to forgive this particular sister?” I confessed and repented of my unforgiving heart to the Lord. Immediately, I sensed the flow of life within me rejoicing. At the same time, I told myself, “I can not believe that I actually forgave her.” It was not me at all who forgave her, but the divine life within me (2 Corinthians 2:10). I knew that I forgave her completely because, whenever I saw her, I no longer felt angry. Later I realized that when I mentioned this particular sister to others, although I touched controversial matters of the past, my spirit was undisturbed and upright (Psalm 51:10). Then the Lord supplied me with His living word, “But by the grace of God, I am what I am; and His grace unto me was not in vain, ...yet not I, but the grace of God which is with me.” (1 Corinthians 15:10) I could only declare that it was not I who forgave her but the grace of God. So I praise the Lord that the divine life could heal my wounded heart, supply the grace for me to forgive others and strengthen my soul. The eternal life, which is Christ Himself (John 11:25, 14:6), is so real and substantial. It can be heard and seen, touched and handled, declared and preached (1 John 1:1, 2). Anonymous | Back to List |
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